Mac’s are expensive pieces of shit.

  1. I’m excluding Iphones. They are in the same range of price as any other smart phone and they are solid machines. If Droids didn’t exist, I’d have one (oh, fuck off with “if Iphones never happened, Droids wouldn’t have”. That’s like saying if glass bottles were never invented, we’d never have Coca-Cola… or…my point is, we would have gotten there eventually). Thing is, Droids just let me customize the shit out of them, and that makes me happy cuz I’m a nerd. So if you want the spoon fed iphone os. Cheers. It’s a good device.
  2. If you are an/a aspiring/professional Graphic Designer, Film Maker or Music Creator/Producer, by all means, buy yourself the expensive piece of shit. The truth is, Photoshop, Final Cut and whatever the shit is used for music on a Mac, are smooth, well thought out programs that intuit a lot of what you want to do.

But that’s it! For the rest of you lot that don’t fall into number 2, here’s this: Your Mac is an expensive piece of shit and you are dumb for owning it.

Average price of a Mac Lappy: 1200-1400

Average price of a Windows Lappy: 500-700

In 2006, Apple started putting Intel processors in their Macs. Since 2006 the inside of a goddamned Mac is exactly the same as the inside of a goddamned windows laptop.

Look back up at that price difference.

That’s a fucking 700 gap on both ends. I could do so much blow with 700 bucks! Blow and fuckin a decent hooker and fuckin dinner and fuckin pay my phone bill for the month. At least.

“The design and build of the Mac lap tops are much more sturdy.” -Design!? Who the fuck gives a shit about design?! Look it. Most people use their laptop for 1 thing, the goddamned internet. All you need, is a light weight box that opens up to have a screen and keyboard on it. (insert chrome books) But fine, how much could that sturdier full of design box cost?  Just to be obnoxious and pretend these things aren’t made in china where they manufacture so many that it probably costs 2 fucking cents, let’s just say it’s 200 dollars. WHERE THE SHIT IS THE OTHER 500 DOLLARS GOING?

Fucking no where.

Advocates of the Mac say that the OS is much simpler than Windows. So basically the Operating System is worth 500 dollars.

Dude.

Bro.

Ubuntu’s OS is BASICALLY the same as Mac except it’s FREE OF FUCKING CHARGE. Seriously. It’s so similar that your not-knowing-what-the-fuck-is-happening-inside-a-computer-anyways eyes would have trouble to tell.

“Well, you can’t get photoshop and word and etc on Ubuntu”.- There is literally a comparable freeware program for every software program on the market. Listen, I’m not trying to sell you Ubuntu (although it’s awesome). There’s def a bit of getting used to with it. Especially when you’re trying to do some serious shit. But really, what do most people need?

Word  = Open Office

Photoshop = Gimp

Safari = Chrome/Firefox

Itunes = Itunes

Did I mention it feels oddly a LOT like a Mac? LINK

So I ask again. Where is the 500 bucks going?

 I’ll tell you where my 500 is going. Savings. Or Hookers. Or both.

In summation:

Mac’s are expensive pieces of shit.

Window pc’s are inexpensive pieces of shit.

Ubuntu is free and amazing but sometimes tedious.

Get a pc. Save your money. Fuck hookers.

e dicho.

Me.

I’m drunk.

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15 thoughts on “Mac’s are expensive pieces of shit.

  1. Clearly drunk. I like when shit just fucking works, which was not the case in the late nineties when I first started to use Linux as a desktop, and it is not the case now, when I dipped my toe in the Ubuntu Koolaid all the kids are talking about. Mac OS is a really, really great Unix distro and can be got for <$100, and I'd gladly pay that many times over for the amount of swearing that it saves me. Same reasoning applies to Windows, which has about the same level of grace, agility, and stability as a whale on a bicycle. As for the hardware, I'm a clumsy fuck, and I've dropped my MBA half a dozen times in the last year, from waist high, onto concrete and tile, and it is none the worse for wear. I dare you to find me a windows laptop that can withstand that and still weigh less than three pounds. Sure, it costs more, and if you can't afford it, then don't fucking buy it. But don't kid yourself that you don't get what you fucking pay for.

    • I don’t see where you’re saving money to fuck hookers though. I’m running Windows and it just fucking works. I’ve seen Mac’s not just fucking work all the time. But I don’t see the point of not fucking hookers i guess is what i’m saying.

  2. My Macbook is now 7 years old and has never been repaired/wiped/defragged etc. Operates just as fast as the day I bought it. I’ve never known a PC laptop (owned by competent computer users or otherwise) to last a third of that time. My laptop = $1000/ 7 years is $143/ year. Low-end PC lappy = $650/3 years (optimistic at that) is $217 per year. End of story. Loyal reader and do love your drunk rants though. Recommended this blog to a friend a while back and he’s a Bill Gates bitch, so I’m sure he will get on here soon and defend your shitty logic

    • Yeah so 7 year old Mac’s that are stilling kicking ass is (unheard of and) before Mac started building them like pc’s. Also, it’s drunk shitty logic. Just to be clear. Once I hit post on this I realized I’d get a whiplash of the Mac cult. Fuck um. Thanks for digging the site.

      • Well, it was a useless response since I am (uncharacteristically) sober. Sober person responding to a drunk person is stupid. Like a man trying to have sex with a sheep. But hey, some of us still try. Good set today

  3. 1. Outstanding design is an added feature that some of us value enough to pay extra for.

    2. Comparing average prices is just silly. There’s certainly a Mac premium, but once you put together a comparable system, the price difference is nowhere near $700. See, for example, this discussion: http://www.mac-guides-and-solutions.com/macs-are-expensive.html

    3. I have built and re-built more PCs than I can remember, I’ve managed to fix nearly every Windows problem under the sun, and I’ve gotten my hands dirty with command lines on everything from Solaris to Linux to FreeBSD. What I love about Macs and OSX: I never *need* to do any of that, since there’s pretty much nothing I can do that suddenly breaks everything, but I can still get my hands on a command line when I want one.

    • Outsanding Design? You mean Flat and grey? Look at what Alienware are doing, customizable, matt black.

      And don’t give me “A Question of taste” bs – Pedos go to jail for a reason.

  4. This is the best thing I’ve read all day, thank you. Your “drunk shitty logic” rings clear with me, at least. Maybe it’s a “me against them” thing, but I have a hard time seeing why followers of the Church of Apple would even enjoy following your blog.

  5. Just obtainned an AlienWare laptop for 2000$. – same price as a Macbook Pro, except I actually have [a compuer] USB ports, so you know I can plug all my shit in, like for my dSLR, external hard drive, Mouse, Android phone used as Modem, and I still have one left over.

    Not to mention the Specs, at laast three times as powerful as a MacBook, As such, I can run my Lightroom / Photoshop REALLY smooth and fast.

    Did I also mention that I have HDMI in and Out for when I want to watch Pirated US Netflix on a big TV Screen?

    Frak Macs, Buy Windows, for the same price you can have soemthing three times better.

    And if you don’t believe me on the price, here are the specs and I can produce the receipt on demand:

    R4
    17.3-in WideFHD1920x1080
    1TB HD
    16gb Ram
    2GB GDDR5 AMD Radeon HD 7970M

    Also, LEDs are to Nerds what spinners / rims are to gangsters.

    And Did I also mention I can run Diablo III on my laptop while streaming a movie on the Big screen at the same time? Fraking-eh, lets see a Mac do that.

  6. Dear m. : The phrase “e dicho” is incorrectly written in spanish. It´s “he dicho”, but H is mute. Anyway, I´m an adict to your page. Don´t stop kicking bums.

  7. Paid $3500 for a loaded up Mac Notebook Pro. Have literally spent more than 100 hours in the past 2.5 years on the phone with Apple support trying to keep it working including them replacing the hard drive. Tomorrow I ship it Texas because of incessant crashes. Never had this much trouble with two Thinkpads over eight plus years. Seriously thinking about shooting the Mac with my shotgun and shipping it to the pricks along with my iPhone so I never have to think about them again.

  8. Bought a used Macbook 2009, have had it for about six months. OS X Lion. In past two weeks, it’s just started to lock up all the damn time. Watching fucking YOUTUBE videos spikes the temp to weapons-grade heat, and the beachball of death appears. Are you kidding me? Flash cripples this thing?

    I’m handing it over to my kids for itunes. That’s all macs are good for. FUCKING THING SUCKS.

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